big girl house AKA around the garden

Springtime poppies

When we moved into our home, we were lucky to have beautiful and immaculate flower gardens that were the labor of love of the previous home owners. Starting in late winter, the first harbingers of spring, crocuses and daffodils bloom with delight and just as they begin dying back, something else is starting to bloom. This cycle of dying back and opening up continues deep into fall. Many visitors have complimented us on our gardens, which even look beautiful from a distance when they are left to the lambs quarters, thistle, dandelions, and bind weed. On the east side of our home, shaded by a tall fence and our neighbors glorious fruit trees, we have two small patches for a vegetable garden and compost - also left by the previous owners. When we moved in, we began to tend to everything the previous owners had left -- except that our weeding habits still aren't what theirs were.

In the three years we have lived here, our flower gardens have bloomed beautiful, while our vegetable gardens have been pathetic to say the least. Some of this is our own neglect. But with a wife's hard work and a toddler who likes to "do his work" in the garden, this year's garden has been the best yet. And still, it's a little pathetic. Now I'm not talking about the numerous millions of weeds that are the result of Avi "feeding chicken scratch" (a mixture of organic wheat, barely, and lentils) to our garden. We pull these weeds (or not) with smiles on our faces. Our problem is our garden is in the shadiest spot on our property. It doesn't get near enough sunlight. We are growing flowers that aren't edible in the brightest sunniest spots on our property while our veggies beg for sunshine in the shade. UGH.

Chard and friends.

Our Early Girls haven't ripened yet.

Beautiful squash blossom, no squashes.

Our weed covered herb garden.  See the chicken scratch growing in there?

Purple Beans

So why is this blog post titled, "big girl house"? Well, I have created the big-girl-house-dilemma because I have had the mindset that we should keep things as they are because they are "nice". In the past, I have always lived in places that were easy to "upgrade". In rentals I lived in, have put new tile in a kitchen, turned drab off white walls into colorful masterpieces, ripped up disgusting carpet to expose beautiful hard wood, dug up a yard of weeds to put in a veggie patch. All of those places needed some a lot of TLC. Our home, our big girl home, was already bursting with TLC when we moved in.... but it was the love given with someone else's taste in mind... not ours.  Sure we took down hideous sconces and lighting fixtures after we moved in. That was easy, those really weren't our taste. But the back yard has been another thing altogether. The flower gardens really are beautiful. I like them. I love that Avi is learning to identify flowers and I have had a good many conversations with my neighbors about the flowers I can't identify. I can't imagine digging them up. But if we want to have the boon that I see in inspiring blog posts like Kim's and Lisa's and so many more... well, we have to do things differently.

But I should take this moment to have a little bit of compassion and remind myself that we have started to do things differently. Putting in our chicken coop was a big step. When my mom saw it she said something to the tune of, "I would have thought you would have put that on the side of your home (where the veggie garden is now). Your yard was so nice". (For the record, it still is nice. We have one of the most beautiful chicken runs I have ever seen. Blooming poppies, jupiter's beard, echinacea, black eyed susan, flowers I don't the name of, apple trees drooping with fruit - just sayin'! -- oh and I should say that my Dad was right when he said that the chicken's won't destroy already established plants).  I'm sure she's not the only one to feel this way. But I decided that since we Jenn and Avi have put so much time, attention, and love into the veggie garden, next year we have to dig up some of our flower beds (share them with neighbors and friends) and get our veggie garden into the sunshine!!!

You can see the morning sunshine is shading our garden and all of Avi's (and Mama's) hard work.

"Doing work, Ema", he says... still in his PJs. (He loves this wheelbarrow from G'ma & G'pa).

Pegasus and kitty cat had spent the night in the compost pile - on purpose. Avi said they were sleeping there.

Now, I just have to figure out the best place. The place that won't be shaded in three years because our silver maple has grown. 

then.and.now

number.eight

 But what minutes!  Count them by sensation, and not by calendars, and each moment is a day.     ~Benjamin Disraeli    

Inviting you to join me in my Monday ritual with your own now and then

(this moment)

A Friday ritual. A single photos - no words - capturing a moment from the week. 

A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. 

If you're inspired to do the same, link your 'moment' in the comments for all to find & see.

Thanks Karen M. for taking this photo.

Inspired by Soulemama

nine

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.  ~Thornton Wilder

This week's treasures include:

-- Gym membership for the whole family turned out to be cheaper than bootcamp for just me. Here, Avi and I taking a break from swimming for a snack. 

 -- His excitement in seeing the deer we share our neighborhood with.

 -- This mess. Yep, that's my calculator on the laptop that I was using to pay bills and my lunch on the ironing board. So thankful that my wife tolerates this space that I use to create!

-- After an immunization, everyone deserves to have whatever they want for lunch: french toast with strawberries. 

 -- This beautiful table (my great great grandmother's table) and the families we joined around it. 

 -- Avi and Owen... fast friends!!

 -- Avi giving baby Kate (newest addition to the neighbors family) a smooch on her head. Kate giving the world a hello wave! (sorry for the blurry photo - it was too cute to leave out!)

 -- Arriving home from morning workout to find these two all cuddled enjoying a story.

-- The resilience of these Zinnia's from Lisa's garden seven days ago. 

(this moment)

A Friday ritual. A single photos - no words - capturing a moment from the week. 

A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. 

If you're inspired to do the same, link your 'moment' in the comments for all to find & see.

Inspired by Soulemama

Happy Birthday Friend

Celebrating Lisa today!! You can find out more about her over at littlecoffeebeans! We love you!

now.and.then

number.seven

 But what minutes!  Count them by sensation, and not by calendars, and each moment is a day.     ~Benjamin Disraeli    

                                                                                            

Avi and Grandma - Summer 2011

Avi and Grandma - Summer 2012

Inviting you to join me with your own now and then

(this moment)

A Friday ritual. A single photos - no words - capturing a moment from the week. 

A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. 

If you're inspired to do the same, link your 'moment' in the comments for all to find & see.

Thanks John W. for this photo

Inspired by Soulemama

**********************************************************************************************************

Nine

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.  ~Thornton Wilder

This week's treasures include:

:: man-purse, blueberries, what more does one need?

:: sometimes I lament that I'm always behind the camera... but I'm glad when I've captured a shot like this.

 :: giggles shared among a flower and a bird.

:: stumbling upon this share library while walking to the park. (I love people).

 :: watching him work/play. 

 :: the special bond he has with our beloved neighbor, Sahand.

:: goodies from Sahand's bounty.

:: a hike with friends. They liked the views. 

:: coming to some important realizations. 

1000 days :: An Ah-Ha Moment

Avi turned two a few weeks ago. A huge milestone. 1000 days from conception until the 2nd birthday. 1000 days.

But as we turned this momentous corner, I found I lost sight of a few things. Let me explain. 

Avi started having some difficulty sleeping. Falling asleep was taking hours and on nights when he did fall asleep easily, he would "wake" several times crying out, "no, no". Sometimes he would be crying out in a kind of bad dream. During the day, transitions were met with meltdowns and screaming became commonplace, frustration levels where through the roof. He became uber clingy and wanted to be carried and held all of the time. We tried to figure out reasons for these things. Was the 4 hour time difference from our Hawaii trip still lingering? Second year molars hurting? Gassy belly from the broccoli he's been loving? Picking up on the stress between his two mamas? Just simply turning 2? Bringing a halt to our 4 am nursing? Too much summertime fruit?

Sure, some and/or all of these things are probably contributing in some way to what's has been going on. But I realized that as Avi turned 2, I/We started talking to Avi about all things "big boy". Big boy bed, big boy unders (underpants), big boy's getting themselves dressed, big boy's telling Ema and Mama when he has to go pee-pee. I'd been asking him about nee-nee (nursing) ending. I/We basically created a paradigm for him to "hurry up and grow up".

Trying to get Avi excited about his big boy unders.

Trying to get Avi excited about a big kid bed by showing him his friends bed. 

Ugh. I/We were pushing too much, too fast. Parenting without mindfulness. Ugh. Time to slow down!!! I put his new unders back in the drawer and decided they would stay there until he asked for them. We are still researching the big boy bed, but have decided to wait a bit... slow down... and introduce the new bed when that is the only "new" thing happening for him.

In the meantime, we are keeping a steady routine with naps and bedtime, eating dinner at home more often to help the nighttime transition, continuing co-sleeping, having longer cuddles before and after naps and first thing in the morning, Jenn and I are pausing our stressful conversations until more appropriate times, and we are generally slowing down and enjoying our two year old. Enjoying more moments likes these:

When Avi woke from his nap yesterday, I asked him about his dreams (as I always do). He told me he dreamt about "diapers and unders". I realized we made the right decision to slow down. Since shifting my own internal state about this -- letting go and slowing down -- so has Avi.

Ahhhhhhh - out breath.

cycling buddies...

How lucky are we that in Boulder, just a few minutes from our home, we have a bike park situated on 40 acres. Our neighbor, Carter, and his Dad John, invited us to join them this past Sunday for a morning of fun at the Valmont Bike Park. With Avi's strider in the trunk, and a coffee pit stop for us, we were off.... only to discover that the park was closed due to weather conditions. A big bummer for us first timers. But with striders in the car and eager 2 year olds, we set off to another trailhead closeby. 

Bike riding is fun, but so is playing along the train tracks. Will a train come today?

The whole morning, passerbys thought John,, Jenn and the two kidlets were a "sweet family".. and I, with the camera, were some random bird watcher. I couldn't help but laugh at our heterosexist society. (Sometimes I'm guilty of making the same assumptions).

Convinced my sweetie to get behind the camera for a few shots of Avi and I. 

With a little help from my friend...

...I can ride with my feet up.

The grand finale!

So much laughter with huge smiles.

Splash!

All muddied up and ready to head home for a nap.

Thanks Carter and John. We look forward to next time at the actual bike park!